Happy new year


and I wake up and I feel no hope
the feeling passes, leaving only a headache and the touch of melancholy

is it me? I wonder.
is this me? Is this what I do?
and if it is, who made me like this?

And I remember the night, and I remember the laughter
and I remember her eyes, looking at me
with some sort of sadness in them

we talked
we always talk
and we hugged and we kissed

I could still not se why I would do this
she fell asleep
I was looking out at the dark
punishing myself by not sleeping

The days are new now
and I realize that the question I have for myself is:
can I change?
Or is this me?

Happy new year.

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